prejudices against the handicapped

I never ask for this nor do I want it. Quiet frankly MS sucks!!!! I do not have self pity because I am sick nor do I want yours.which is why I don't tell people I have it. ok well I guess I just did.But this is the first time I am admitting it to anyone. Hell I have really just admitted it to myself. It is real and it is incurable. There I said it and now own my illness. I hate the pity, stares, and stigma that comes with having MS. Pray for us, help us, love us, appreciate us, and help us find the cure we have been waiting so long for. For we have the strength to stand together and fight for our lives. For those of you who are curious what my daily life is like here is a link to help you understand. OK the optic neuritis is like this when I have a flare up, but it does effect my daily life for my vision sucked to begin with.

http://www.ms-gateway.com/understanding-ms/ms-simulator-53.htm

OK here is another link it ticked me off so bad that I wrote to Kennedy and Kerry. There is no reason for this to have ever happened had the cop just listened to her. Are you kidding me I see law suit and Rodney King all at the same time. This is the kind of thing that gets me going. She looks so good she cannot be sick. really well I look so good and I'm sick. This is the new millennium when will we stop judging people by how they look on the outside, before we get to know what is on the inside. Let me know your thoughts on this.

http://www.abc40tv.com/global/video/popup/pop_playerLaunch.asp?vt1=... with MS Says State Police Used Excessive Force in Front of Son During Traffic Stop

Thanks for your time,and enjoy the writing below.

Who are the people with Multiple Sclerosis?

We are your parents, your children, your brothers and sisters; we are the person down the street; we are that lady or fellow who may walk a little "funny" at the grocery store. We are the people that you "tsk, tsk" over because we might look "too good" to use a handicapped parking space. We are the folks who may not be able to get out to the Church or Temple every weekend; we are your peers; we are human beings.

We are the face of Multiple Sclerosis. A face that is nearly every ethnicity; that comes from nearly every country, that does not discriminate by social standing or class or financial or educational background or language or religion. We are both able to walk unassisted and use canes and walkers and wheelchair users; we jog and swim and partake in sports; we are housebound, we use scooters; we need respirators. We are everything in between. We are visually impaired and we are not. We are at every level of physical ability.

Of course, we "look so good" while we're doing it. We hear that phrase every day of our lives. Sometimes that phrase is meant as a compliment and sometimes it is meant to hurt or meant to shame us into doing something of which we may not be currently capable. We may be able to do that something tomorrow, though, or next week; Multiple Sclerosis is like that. We are like that.

Some of us are hearing impaired; yet all of us occasionally have people talk louder to us. "HOW ARE YOU D-O-I-N-G????" they'll scream, speaking to us as though we were either hearing or intellectually impaired. "YOU LOOK SO G-O-O-D!!!!"

Of course we do. Thank you very much. We are, in fact, the very best looking people in the handicapped community. We have secret beauty pageants every year, to decide which of our number is the absolute best-looking. Billy Crystal emcees, as his character Fernando; "...and you look MARVELOUS my dear; absolutely M-A-R-V-E-L-O-U-S..."

We are brave. We are fragile. We want to live, and we want to end it all. We look for support and we want to stand alone. We are Every person. We are the People with Multiple Sclerosis. We are People, Just Like You....

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Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by SassySweetBren on February 28, 2009 at 5:28pm: My heart does go out to you. I know that you do not want anyone to feel sorry for you. However, I do have a place in my heart for you. You are a very brave woman.

So many times in my life, I have seen people being overlooked for having a challenge to deal with in life. Nothing is wrong with their brain but they do not get recognized for the smart person that they are.

I think that people do not like to be faced with what could happen to them. Yes, what you have can happen to anyone if I understand this correctly.

Thank you for posting this. All of us need to be more aware of what life is like for someone who did not ask for a problem such as yours.

You have my prayers. My darling grand daughter could be the next victim. I pray that she is not.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Eric L. on February 28, 2009 at 6:23pm: My darling wife. I love you.

Pretty brave of you to post something this personal on this site. You never cease to amaze me, although I should be used to it because you are an amazing woman, wife, and mother.

Even with as much that was said in your post it doesn't even scratch the surface of the implications of this disease, and all those that it effects, how it effects those around the one that is suffering from this disease. I think that making people aware is a very important step.

I know the burdens of having this disease, as I see them in you each and every day. I know the burdens that it has on people around someone that is suffering, as that is the life I lead. And I know the fears, guilt, and sadness that you feel each and everyday. I know your biggest fear is me leaving you, as marriages with this disease have an 85% failure rate. I am here to tell you in black and white, in front of 15,257 fellow members, that 18 years ago I promised you... in sickness and in health, threw good times and bad, till death do us part. I never ever have broken a promise to you or anyone else, and I think after 18 years I've had the chance to prove it. There isn't anything that anyone can throw in-between us that we can't over come, and I know that someday we, together will overcome this too, And you can take that promise to the bank.

I think you should talk to Chris, and see if he or maybe someone else would know the different avenues that might be available to you as to making this more public, and really get into the everything that this disease effects and what you have learned and how you and you and your family have learned to cope with this disease. I will see you later tonight.

I love this woman!!! I'm her biggest fan, and I'm never leaving her for any reason.

--Eric

P.S.
Sorry to be so personal in here. I was going to do this in e-mail, but I needed witnesses(I figured over 15,000 was adequate ), and had to tell all of you that there is so much more to this disease than she could ever write about.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Ado Rey on February 28, 2009 at 6:42pm: Reading both your reply and your valiant wife Jada's discussion entry really touched me. I say this without sarcasm or pity, only honesty and warmth in my heart. I may not have a clue to what MS is or the hardships it bears but my heart goes out to people with disability in general. I am living with my 87-year old father who is, although not in any means handicapped and is still ambulatory for his very fragile age...most of his friends (at least 7 years younger) are diseased now with various ailments. I also adopted my nephew from the province and he has a case of slight Cerebral Palsy but is currently being absorbed by a school with Special Education. My sister is a pioneer doctor of Developmental Pediatrics in the Philippines, with a specialized interest in Autism.

As you see, my world revolves around people with very special needs. I have a few ambitions in life, one of which is to be truly happy in the service mostly of my loved ones. May God reach out to others with your ailment, Jada and May God Bless You both.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Jada L. on February 28, 2009 at 7:55pm: Thanks for your kind words, and may gos also bless you and your family.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Ado Rey on February 28, 2009 at 9:58pm: Thanks as well. I appreciate it ;-); ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Haydn on March 3, 2009 at 1:24pm: You two are inspirational. Thank you for posting.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Jada L. on February 28, 2009 at 6:44pm: omg honey I love you too. you almost made me cry.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by SassySweetBren on February 28, 2009 at 8:10pm: Jada, he almost made you cry? Honey, he did make me cry.

I love it when a man states out right, how much he loves his wife. To me he is a hero. And I know in my heart that he certainly is your hero as you are his.

It is amazing how disadvantages can bring the best out of some people. My favorite cousin has a grand daughter with MS. They love that child so. We all do.

People like you Jada who has courage like your husband just said, are the ones who gets things going. Who knows what this discussion may bring about in time? I am just delighted that you wrote it.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Jada L. on February 28, 2009 at 9:47pm: Thank you so much for those kind words. He is a very speacial man and I thank god everyday for sending me to a gas staion to get a soda. I knew in that very moment I had found the man I was going to marry.Even though I was only 16 at the time. Who knew almost 19 years later we would still be going strong. God is amazing and I know in my heart that everyting happens for a reason Even if we cannot always see it. MAybe if the right person sees this then all of us with ms can finally be free, and others will never know the suffering that we do. Thant would be the best gift I could ever get.
Take care and god bless you.
Jada; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by SassySweetBren on March 1, 2009 at 11:05am: Life is an amazing adventure Jada. Just like you meeting your husband and knowing in your heart that he was the right man for you.

I have a feeling that many blessing are coming your way my dear. In spite of all that you have to deal with in your life each day, I see many blessing surrounding you.

You are right about the right person seeing this. Your story needed to be told and people need to read it. I am just sorry that most people on here have chosen not to respond.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Jada L. on March 2, 2009 at 4:03pm: That is about what I expected though. Most people are not comfortable talking to a person with handicaps,nor are they comfortable talking about handicaps. That was part of why I did this. I know there are allot of people in the world just like me. They have no voice and I chose to be that voice for them. I did not expect a ton of replies on this. I just wanted to get my message out there. If all they do is read this then I am good with that, and have accomplished my goal. I again thank you for all your kind words and blessings. They mean more then you will ever know.
May god always smile upon you and bless you.
Jada; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by SassySweetBren on March 2, 2009 at 4:14pm: Jada, have you considered blogging about your life and the illness that you cope with in your life? How it affects you as well as your family. What you know about the illness....maybe you could start doing research and keep the message going about it.

It just occurred to me. That would be a great way to get your message out. Oh, I know that you did this blog but I mean in a big way each week and on a different site.

There are many places where one can blog. I have a blog on Yahoo and Google. There are even programs that helps one with their writing.

Maybe you should check into doing that. It would be a great way for you to relieve stress. I have found over the years that writing about my feelings is the best medicine ever.

I hope that you are having a nice day Jada.; ▶ Reply to This