Can any discussion on Geeks be done without negativity taking over?

I am like everyone else on here, I create discussions, blogs and participate in others, but usually, no matter what is posted, we always end up with people being negative, rude or just unable to be polite!

Why do you think this is? Of course, you are not allowed to be negative in your responses!

I don't think it CAN BE DONE!!!!

▶ Reply to This

Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Mystic Virgo on November 10, 2009 at 5:24am: I have been on the net since the late eighties and I have participated in many different chatrooms, Forums, Bulletin Boards, ect. I have weathered more flamethrowing trolls than I can count, even If could ,or wanted to, remember all of them.

In any discussion, there will be posters with positive opinions and negative opinions. There will be posters who can remain calm and collected in the most heated of debates. There will be posters who become overly passionate just discussing what particular shade of blue the sky happens to be on any given day.

I have noticed that text based communications, Be it a written paper, an email, forum posts, chats, ect, can facilitate miscommunication of intent. I think that this ( I think.. indicating opinion for I don't have the ability to prove it), is because we are removed from the emotional cues that are also so important when we communicate. As such, we tend to infer the emotional state of the writer. I had caught myself doing this every now and again.. Have a freind make a post or comment that, just becasue I was having a bad day, tired, whatever, I took as an attack when there was actually none at all. S/He wold then take offense at what I had posted and the flameing begins.

I have learned to be very careful of how I say what I say. To choose words very carefully. Some people get upset if they have to google a word.

I have learned never to 'make it personal' or 'take it personaly' by insulting or disparaging other posters. My personal rule is " If the make me loose my cool then the other person has won the debate/arguement."

I also learned not to confuse negativity with "devil's advocacy" ( I do this all the time) where I will take an opposing view in a discussion , even if I totally concur, just to make certain that the other party is aware of ramifications, all the possible con's, and sometimes just to sharpen my debatory claws.. (rawr!)

Okay I have ran out of caffine, so have to fix a fresh pot.... More later..

geeks! :P; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Gordon Keenan on November 10, 2009 at 6:54am: Could not agree more! Well put and sums it all up nicely!; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Mystic Virgo on November 10, 2009 at 3:17pm: So I get cookie now?; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Dan on November 10, 2009 at 5:09pm: Mystic
Nicely done. You remind me of someone else on this site....
I'll have a cup o that java if you don't mind... :D

BTW, we don't do 'cookies' around here, but if you look in your browser cache, you will find several....; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by SassySweetBren on November 10, 2009 at 7:15pm: We do cookies. I am the cookie woman but have been away. Got some right out of the oven. Let me go get Mystic a place full with some killer coffee.

Served with lots of hugs.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Mystic Virgo on November 10, 2009 at 7:25pm: Ahhh Thanks Sassy! Huw'd ya guess that Peanutbutter with forkprints were my favorite!; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Dan on November 10, 2009 at 9:36pm: OK, with the ONE exception of SSB alias Cookie Monsterette. LOL!; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by SassySweetBren on November 11, 2009 at 11:11am: Mystic, I have powers but only on Tuesdays. ....Hey, Dan should have remembered that I freely give out cookies and hugs. The coffee was a plus because you are so nice and sweet. ha ha; ▶ Reply to This